Staying Positive

So, as you know, if you have been following my blog recently, our family will be going through a lot of changes in the next 6-8 months. Most of them stem around Jesse getting orders and deciding to reenlist in the Air Force. It may just seem like one change, the fact that we will be moving to New Jersey, but to us, it will involve a lot of things being different.

We are both feeling extremely optimistic about our future, even though it seems like we have been kind of bombarded with negative comments. Some of them have hurt my feelings and others just make me question why people are so pessimistic and why they would want to drag us down when the decision has already been made and it’s what we want.

Obviously, we are moving to a new area of the country and will be far away from my family and our friends. These changes are major and the ones most people realize, but there are a couple more that are due to a move.

Jesse will be home so much more! I am absolutely thrilled about this and would move to the other side of the globe to have this. So don’t you dare tell me that his new job isn’t as exciting, a good career advancement move, etc. We feel strongly that is an AMAZING family advancement and that is our priority in having a young family. I am over the moon excited to know that Jesse will be home every night and every major holiday. Many families may take this for granted, but this will be a huge change for us. I’ve spent far too many Thanksgivings and Christmas’ without my husband.
I will most likely become a stay at home mom. Jesse and I really want to have a second child soon and the idea of not being at home with them makes me sad. The 4:45am alarm is getting old and it is getting increasingly harder for me to leave my little guy to go to work. I am beyond excited to have the opportunity to try out my domestic skills by taking care of my family, cooking, cleaning and whatever else staying at home entails. I’ve never done it, so I will have to learn! J
But this is where the most hurtful comments have come from. I’m getting a little teary even thinking about them. “You won’t last staying at home.” “You’ll get bored.” “You just don’t seem cut out to be around kids all day.” I cannot tell you how many people have said these things to me. I know I am looking beyond the words actually spoken, but these things shoot straight to my heart. What I hear is that I am not enough.

I feel like most women pride themselves on being a wife and a mother. Some put just as much pride in being successful in their career and that’s great. But I am not one of them. I have three days a week at home with Hunter and I can honestly tell you I dread going back to work every single Monday. I never feel like I am in need of getting a break from ”. I do get impatient at times when Hunter is not behaving, listening, etc. but not enough to make me want to get away.

I understand that I have never stayed at home, so I cannot compare the two. But, Jesse and I agree that we will be moving and starting our lives in New Jersey with no expectations about how long I will not work for. It might be for years or it could only be for six months. But come on friends and family; don’t speak negative thoughts over our lives when we are doing exactly what we desire to do. If I didn’t want to try staying at home, I wouldn’t!

It is an amazing blessing that we are in a spot where we will be able to live off one income and see how it goes. I feel amazingly fortunate to be able to have this opportunity and cannot wait until I can spend my days solely with my boys. :)