Praying for a Miracle

Ever since Hudson was diagnosed with his hearing loss, we have been praying for healing, complete restoration of his hearing. The doctor told us that the type of hearing loss that Hudson has will never change, it is what it is. It will never get any better or worse. But, as Christians, we believe that Jesus is the greatest physician, he can heal things that "can't be healed".

Last week, while praying, I felt led to fast. I had never really fasted before, but was ready to be obedient. I woke up last Thursday morning and knew that I wasn't supposed to eat anything except for dinners until after Hudson's appointment on Monday afternoon. When Jesse got home that afternoon, I told him what I was being led to do, and he joined me in fasting. If you've never done a prayer fast, the idea of it is to remember to pray. Every time I felt hungry, irritable, uncomfortable, lightheaded, etc...I prayed. And I prayed and I prayed. 

A couple hours before Hudson's appointment yesterday, I broke down into tears. I cried into Jesse's shoulder and told him that I had never felt so desperate for Jesus. I've been pretty fortunate in my life to have not been in many situations that I  had no control over. But...this journey with Hudson has brought me to my knees. I need Jesus to fix my little boy. Don't get me wrong, I am prepared to deal with his hearing loss, but I just know that God wants to heal him. Whether it be now or in 50 years, I believe with my entire being that he will be healed. 

I pulled myself together and we took Hudson into his appointment. I held Hudson on my lap in a sound booth while the Audiologist spoke and played sounds into speakers on each side of the room. Whenever Hudson would look to the sound, she would make toys in that area light up and make noises. He first did it without his hearing aids. He seemed to be turning his head to the noises a lot, but I didn't get my hopes up, because I know that he can hear sound. We then did the same with his hearing aids. When we were done....the doctor looked a little baffled. 

She said that Hudson was hearing high pitch frequencies at decibels much lower than he should be able to hear them at. She said that she played them higher and higher and that he was hearing them at normal hearing levels. The ABR (the extensive test measuring brain waves that was used originally to diagnose him) said that he shouldn't hear those frequencies until 50 decibels, but he was hearing them at 25 decibels. She also said that he had a lot of fluid in his ears, which would make his hearing worse. But no...his hearing appeared to of improved. So, she wants us to get the fluid in his ears cleared up with his peditrician and then get a referral for another ABR because something was not adding up. 

And they brought to Jesus a man who was deaf and had a speech impediment, and they begged him to lay his hand on him. And taking him aside from the crowd privately, he put his fingers into his ears, and after spitting touched his tongue. And look up to heaven, he sighed and said to him, "Ephphatha," that is, "Be opened." And his ears were opened...and he spoke plainly, And Jesus charged them to tell no one, but the more he charged them, the more zealously they proclaimed it. And they were astonished beyond measure, saying "He has done all things well. He even makes the deaf hear and the mute speak. Mark 7:32-37

Keep on asking, and you shall receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened for you. Matthew 7:7

I also know through the Word, that Hudson is the way he is because it is God's will for the time being. If it's God's will for him to have hearing loss forever, that is fine and is His will. We are prepared for it.

 As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind? "Neither this man or his parents sinned," said Jesus, "but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him. John 9:1-3

So some would say it's a radical faith to "expect" our prayers to be answered or that it is a silly and blind faith. But isn't that what faith is? The belief in something that we cannot see? I have complete faith in God's word and I choose to take it literally and know that if Jesus is the same today as he was yesterday....and he was healing people left and right in the past, of course he can still heal in the present.

Thank you so much for your prayers and kind words. We are so grateful for all the love and support that has been given to us and Hudson. 

God Ruined My TV Watching

Ha! He did, but it's good! I've felt really conflicted lately about some of the shows on TV that I watch. I just feel like television SO desensitizes people to the immoral. I can't hardly think of any shows that don't have rampant disregard for others, inappropriate sexual situations, violence, gossip, etc.

I'm just filling my head with garbage! Even though I am obviously an adult, who can watch what I please, does not mean that I should. Just last week I was cruising around on Netflix, looking for a new show to start watching. I came across the show "Weeds" and had heard some friends talk about it.

Oh boy. I knew right off the bat that I probably shouldn't watch it....but I watched the first six episodes in three days. The last night I watched it, I finished the sixth episode, and then laid down to pray and go to bed. I felt so ashamed to go from watching that show to prayer. The graphic sex scenes, drug use, language...you name it...it was there.

Then I remembered when I got into watching True Blood a few years ago. Same thing, I felt so convicted about the horrible things I was exposing myself to, that I called Dish and asked them to turn off HBO. Yes, I was that weak, I had to not have it available to stop watching it. Now I'm seeing that Showtime shows are just as bad!

If you watch these shows, I'm not saying you shouldn't, just saying that for me, I felt that it was not good for my walk as a Christian. That could be because I'm easily desensitized or influenced by these things. I just need to take that stuff out of my life....even if I don't really want to. What I know is that I want to obey God when being led to remove these things.

So why am I writing this? To make you feel like a heathen if you watch these shows? NO! Not at all. Pretty much just for myself to be accountable to stop!

Please tell me I'm not the only one that gets wrapped into this stuff! Please? Lol. And...not the only who feels guilty about it.

Turning 30 This Year

Can it really be? Ugh. I'm not one to get depressed about getting older, I just can't believe I'll be in my 30's in just a few short months! 5 months. 

5 months isn't very long, so I thought that I would make a short list of things I hope to accomplish by September 8th.

1. Finish reading the entire bible. I just started a couple weeks ago and am almost through Numbers.

2. Lose 15lbs. I have not talked about the baby weight that I have not lost...it's a sore subject. Well, not sore, just depresses me a bit. I'll post about this soon.

3. Make a trip to Dallas with the family. Do some shopping, hopefully see a baseball game, go to the aquarium and zoo with the kids.

4. Start and finish C25K.

5. Start learning how to quilt.

6. Have straight teeth. Getting Invisalign this next week and it should take about 5 months.

Hopefully I can make it through this short list.

Infant Must Haves 3+ Months

I did a newborn must have post a few months back and got a lot of positive feedback about it. So...I thought I might share some of my favorite things that I've liked using with Hudson in the last few months.

1. Gap Body Doubles. These things are the best. I don't know why I am so picky about kid clothes, but I am. I really don't love the look of onesies. The tucked in look with jeans just looks nerdy to me. So these are the perfect solution to keep their little tummies warm and covered up, but with the look of a normal shirt.

How cute is this one? I just ordered it online for Hudson :)

2. Toys. Here are a couple of my favorite toys for Hudson. 

Sophie the Giraffe

iPlay Flash Beat Drum

Manhattan Baby Skwish

3. Hudson still likes to sleep swaddled. I know, I know, 7 month babies are usually still swaddled. But I'm not too concerned about it, he settles down immediately once swaddled. I love the Swaddleme blankets because they keep him securely wrapped up and they are easy to use.

4. Avent. We use both Avent bottles and pacifiers for Hudson. It's just what he prefers. 

That's about it. We're pretty low key about all the extra "stuff" he needs. I feel like I was over the top with Hunter and kind of learned my lesson. 

What are some things you use on a daily basis for your little ones this age?

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Hunter at 3 1/2

Even crazier than Hudson being 7 months? Hunter being 3 and a half today! Oh how I love this little boy that made me a mommy. He never ceases to amaze me and make me so proud.

Hunter has changed so much in the last few months. He has developed so much compassion since becoming a big brother. He heart is so tender and sweet. He looks after Hudson and often puts a pacifier back in Hudson's mouth before I can. He's starting to show interest in learning how to put Hudson's hearing aids in, too. I just love how he's learning to serve others through being a big brother.

He's also grown so much since we've moved to Oklahoma in developing a love for his Savior. He talks about Jesus, prays with so much enthusiasm (usually), asks to pray over his brother for healing, and has started lifting up with hands to worship God. Really, what could make a mom more proud?!

 

He is no doubt a mama's boy. He cuddles on my lap as much as I let him. He gives hugs and kisses so freely and often tells me "Mommy you are my favorite" "Mommy you are my best friend" or "Mommy I love you soooo much". Melts my heart so much. I eat it up and try to cherish these moments because I know they won't last forever.

He does love doing "boy" things with daddy. They go drive in the country scouting for animals, complete with Hunter's own pair of binoculars to spot them out the window. They go check feeders to turkey hunting, eat gas station pizza and sour worms, and watching movies together.


Hunter's doing really well at preschool. He goes two mornings a week. He's been working on his letters and learning some bible verses. He's starting to show interest in writing his name. He has the "H" and "U" down pretty well, but needs me to help him with the rest.

He's sleeping well at night, but is a bit of a night owl. He usually falls asleep around 9:30pm and sleeps until about 8am. He's fighting nap time hard, so he usually only takes a nap when we happen to be in the car in the late afternoon, then I can usually transfer him to the couch for a longer nap.

He's a terrible eater. He just likes to snack and doesn't like many "dinner" foods. We're starting to crack down and this. He eats what's on his plate or he doesn't eat anything else for the rest of the night. This has caused some major tantrums, but it's getting a bit easier. A lot of times, he'll go back to his dinner a couple hours later and eat some of it.

He's really finding his will and can be a bit defiant a times. He is testing the boundaries by arguing and disagreeing with things Jesse and I tell him. I usually put him in timeout until he is ready to stop arguing and agree with what we told him. For example; Yesterday he wanted a cookie. I said no, but he went int he kitchen, got one, and told me "I CAN have a cookie." He went in timeout until he would say "I cannot have a cookie."

Overall, he's such an easy going and good natured kid. He's a joy and I'm so blessed to be his mom.

 

 

 

Hudson at 7 Months

Ugh, really? 7 months already? Every month that goes by, seems to of been the quickest one yet. With Hunter, I looked forward to him growing up and seeing the little boy he was growing into, it never made me sad. Hudson is a whole different story, I tear up, I fight him not being a baby anymore. I'm sure it's because I knew that Hunter would not be the last and Hudson may be.

He is doing awesome, though! Hudson has got to be one of the sweetest and nicest babies. He's so full of joy and only fusses when hungry or tired. He's living such a peaceful little life since I've gotten to know him better. His cues have gotten so easy to read, I feel like I know just what he needs and when he needs it.

Eating: This baby loves his food! He's drinking about five 6oz bottles and eats solids twice a day. It doesn't matter if it's peas or bananas or green beans or apples, he gobbles it all right up. I've been much more relaxed with him than I was with Hunter in introducing him to new foods. He's had pieces of oranges, macaroni and cheese, little pieces of chicken, etc. this month.

Sleep: Hudson has become a dream baby as far as sleeping goes. (I never thought I'd be saying that about him!) He goes to bed between 7-7:30pm and sleeps straight through until 7-7:30am. No complaints here! He naps a lot. He takes three naps a day and they range from 1-3 hours. Usually at least one of the naps is 2+ hours. He's only awake for about 2 hours between naps, so doing anything with him, besides quick errands is a bit difficult still. That's okay though, not much to do here in Altus anyways! Oh yeah, and he still will not sleep anywhere but in his crib and swaddled for the most part. He knows what he likes.

Other: Hudson is wearing mostly 6 months clothes still and size 3 diapers. He's such a skinny little peanut! He sits up all the time unassisted like a pro. He likes to sit by Hunter while he's playing with toys and even joins in when playing ninja turtles. He's been responding to "kissy lips" and leans in for a big open mouth kiss. I'm pretty sure he's starting to cut two of his top teeth, but they haven't poked through quite yet.

He also LOVES his doggy. Henry and him are pretty much best buds. Hudson's eyes light up when he sees Henry. And Henry is pretty quick to lay down next to Hudson and give him kisses.

 

Hunter and Hudson have also become much better buddies lately. I think now that Hudson can sit up and grab toys, Hunter has an easier time "playing" with Hudson.